is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
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I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
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He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
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