We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize