where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize