hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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