why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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