Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize