Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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