When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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