If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
