I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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