He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
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i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
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My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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