I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
