I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Randomize
