Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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