I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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