That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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