is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
