I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
