Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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