It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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