I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
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