hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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