So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
