we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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