just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize