at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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