"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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