im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
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