somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
