Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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