Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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