I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize