how can u be prego again
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
