do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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