Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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