We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
youre lurking in front of me
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
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