i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
