Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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