So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
