A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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