if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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