Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
my being single is dangerous.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize