Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
