I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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