if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
