Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
