also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
