I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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