I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!