ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode