I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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